Tuesday, October 30, 2012

*~*~*Sandy*~*~*

For 33 hours I stayed in a hospital over the last two days. Thankfully I was not a patient; I was at work and became stuck because of road restrictions. I shared my room with two lovely people from my unit and we made the most of the situation. Part of this was requisitioning an extra bed on the unit before anyone else got to it.

In the process I was at work off duty and I wandered back to the pediatric unit on my floor. I went back to help with the babies; I fed them, held them, gave them contact for a while. When the newborns come to our floor they are frequently needing light therapy for jaundice or need more time to detox. The nurses and techs love them too but there just isn't enough time to give them the individual attention. I have fallen in love with one of the babies and the staff have joked I should take it home with me, including the doctor.

It's interesting because the difference between having a job where overnights are a regularity and not having them at all resulted in long days and sleepless nights. After my scheduled hours I changed into comfortable clothing and tried to do homework and this lasted for an hour before I was falling asleep on my books. That sleepiness has continued into today further indulging on my procrastination of this session. I need  to get on track but it isn't going to happen today.

For 33 hours I was game on, in front of people, unable to take the mask off. I realized how much I appreciate having my own place, an area that is safe and mine. For the glorified closet nature of my apartment it still mine only, I can afford to live by myself this way. By 11am my voice had a slight tremor to it when I was checking in with my therapist, who I am unable to see this week because of the storm. She was able to validate my feelings of the heaviness of my situation and she vocalized the difficult nature of what was going on.

Sandy was an unexpected storm that gave me an opportunity to see how much I have grown.


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