Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Sincerely, me...

     Sincerity is an awesome quality. Whether expressed through a sincere smile or through genuine concern, when I see it in others a sense of well-being fills my own soul. Too much of our culture is based on fake and superficial needs. Hollywood focuses on obesity and diets when the emphasis should be on balanced nutrition and healthy living. Mainstream focuses on staying youthful instead of aging gracefully. I often wonder how interactions with others would change if we just lifted the shallow lenses from our eyes long enough to see people for who they are, not what they are.
     For me I feel it's important to be sincere, to be genuine. Not being so, with even the smallest things, has never gotten me anywhere. And there's also the interpersonal relationships based on being real vs. hiding how I feel, they have helped me so much and last so much longer.
     In the sense of recovery I am learning to be more sincere: with my treatment team, my family, with friends. It's hard for them to help me build a lasting recovery if I don't let them in to the struggle with me. I've also had several moments of precious clarity in which I've seen my life without my eating disorder and had such a genuine growth of hope for this life that I don't ever want to go back to minimizing what is wrong. My relationship with me has to change before I can fully change my relationships with other. I'm not there yet. But I'm definitely further than where I've been.

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